Category Archives: Poetry

American Idle

“Throw me the idol, I’ll throw you The whip..” That empty promise Almost cost Indy His life. Today, it was an idle Of a different spelling That whipped up My stress levels And threw a life Less ordinary Into a … Continue reading

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A Beautiful Enigma

I cannot read you Like one of The numerous books I devour On a regular basis. If anything, You were written In an entirely different language By a truly gifted Mystery author, Who refuses to reveal Who done it. You … Continue reading

Posted in Dating, Humor, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Hot As Hell (Not!)

O how I abhor it, When foolish mortals, A species who wasted The gift of Free Will, And is on the verge Of destroying the planet With which they were gifted, Try to tell me, The Prince of Darkness And … Continue reading

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The Dentist

O Dentist, My Dentist, The time has come For our semi-annual Get together. Oh how I hate Seeing you, Even though, By all accounts, You seem to be A very nice guy. I’ll never forget That time I ran Into … Continue reading

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It’s Hot, I’m Cool

Walking around Like a bad ass In my Kylo Ren Tee shirt, Sweating in the Ninety degree heat, And being Totally cool With it. Why don’t I care That a heat wave Is scorching Maine And the sun Is relentlessly … Continue reading

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Confessions of a Rain Walker

Why do you always Look at me So strangely After I tell you I’ve been walking In the rain? I know I’m Incredibly sweet, But that Doesn’t mean I’m made Of sugar, So don’t worry That the raindrops Will cause … Continue reading

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The Downpour

Unfortunately, Not every day Can be perfectly baked In eternal sunshine And gently swaddled In unicorn stampedes. Most days, Especially those That fall during The work week, Tend to be Annoyingly riddled With wild wildebeests Hellbent on Rampaging through The … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments