Tag Archives: life

An Open Plea To Heat Miser

Posted on July 22, 2022 by Austin

Dear Heat Miser, As I’m sure your brother Snow Miser has informed you, I’ve been at war with him for a couple of decades over an incident that occurred while we were in college. I have long since tried to … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor | Tagged , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Vacation Planning 101(I)

Posted on July 18, 2022 by Austin

I finally find myself on vacation, Modern Philosophers.  Before you pepper me with questions about where I’m going, and requests for postcards from those undisclosed destinations, let me share my Vacation Planning with you. Avoid People At All Costs.  This … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Time Travelers Wanted

Posted on May 30, 2022 by Austin

I never look at the classifieds, Modern Philosophers. I already have a job that pays well, so there’s no need to go looking for anything else.  To be honest, I’d hate to find a job that I love so much … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Get The Hell Off My Lawn, Old Age!

Posted on May 27, 2022 by Austin

I don’t know what kind of sadistic curse has been put on me, Modern Philosophers, but when I went to mow the lawn yesterday, I tweaked something in my back and have never been in such pain. It was bad … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

When Loneliness Affects Your Self Worth

Posted on March 26, 2022 by Austin

I make a lot of mistakes, Modern Philosophers. When they are pointed out to me, I get super embarrassed and then vow to never make them again so I don’t have to experience such humiliation in the future.  I know … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 13 Comments

A Guy Walks Into A Bank…

Posted on March 24, 2022 by Austin

Those Modern Philosophers who are familiar with my work, know that when I set a story in a bank, that bank is going to get robbed. I blame it on my Dad’s working in a bank his whole life, and … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Too Stupid?

Posted on February 27, 2022 by Austin

“Do you think I’m stupid?” Aaron’s question broke the silence, and caused Holly to almost drop her coffee.  It was a peaceful Sunday morning along the river, and the best friends were seated on their favorite bench. “What kind of … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Blizzarding For The Seasonally Exhausted

Posted on January 29, 2022 by Austin

I don’t know about you, Modern Philosophers, but I am so done with this winter.  It has left me physically exhausted, mentally drained, and once again questioning my decision to willing live inside the universe’s most annoying snow globe. As … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Losing My Frigidity

Posted on January 22, 2022 by Austin

I am really starting to hate winter, Modern Philosophers. And for those smart asses who feel compelled to point out that I never should have moved to Maine if I hated winter, I will point out that I had a … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

Rebooting the Franchise

Posted on January 16, 2022 by Austin

“If life came with a Reset button, do you think you’d ever have the courage, or maybe the total lack of hope for your future, necessary to push it?” Aaron hit her with the heavy philosophical question after taking a … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments