The rumor that a cabal of Mad Scientists has been traveling back in time to capture, and then cryogenically freeze dinosaurs to unleash on an unwitting population as part of a plan for World Domination, has been picking up steam, Modern Philosophers.
Social Media is abuzz as the world theorizes about where the dinosaurs are being stashed, where the Mad Scientists have set up their evil lair, and which cities will be the targets when the beasts are unleashed.
Wanting to get some answers, I called the one person I knew who could not only out think a Mad Scientist, but who was also an expert on Time Travel.
“Word around the particle accelerator is that while this is a very intriguing plot, the technology doesn’t quite yet exist to make it happen,” my good friend Doc Brown told me as we sipped Snapples on the front porch of The House on the Hill.
I didn’t understand what part of the technology was missing. We both knew for a fact that Time Travel was real, and everyone knows about cryogenics.
“What’s missing is how to transport the dinosaurs from millions of years in the past to the cryo lab in the present day or future,” Doc explained as his voice drifted off, a sure sign that he was running calculations in his head.
“I’d definitely move them to the future when the technology for reviving the cryogenically frozen would be advanced enough to make this all work. However, I just don’t see how you’d get them there.”
Doc got up and began to pace. “Do you freeze them in the past and then move them to the future? “Do you transport live dinosaurs into the future, risking all kinds of damage to the time/space continuum, and then freeze them? Do you stun them in the past, transport them to the present, freeze them, and then zip them to the lab in the future? None of those idea would work by my calculations, Austin!”
Sweat poured off Doc’s brow when he finally sat down again and chugged the rest of his Snapple. I quickly got him a new bottle.
“I love the idea,” he admitted as he rubbed the cold bottle on the back of his neck. “Unleashing dinosaurs on present day Earth would be an excellent way to quickly assert your dominance and control. I just think more work has to be done on cryogenics vis-a-vis dinosaurs. I might tinker around with that a bit when I have some free time…”
“Of course there are!” my pal replied with a hearty chuckle. “As long as there is science, there will be Mad Scientists conducting their crazy experiments, and figuring out ways to use their knowledge for evil and the accumulation of wealth through nefarious means. It’s the Circle of Science.”
That totally blew my mind, Modern Philosophers. While I’ve never known Doc Brown to be wrong, I also know that if something is on the Internet, it has to be true.
So, I’m thinking it’s only a matter of time before I see a T Rex stopping for a drink in the Penobscot River at the end of my street.
What do you think, Modern Philosophers? Do you believe Mad Scientists are secretly stockpiling dinosaurs to take over the world? Or do you believe Doc Brown’s claim that the science isn’t quite there yet? How soon do you think it will be before you see dinosaurs laying waste to your neighborhood?