Snow Miser Taunts Mainers: “Miss Me Now, Punks?”

Snow MiserJust when we thought we were done with him for a few months, Snow Miser has pulled us back in!  Radios and Televisions across Maine crackled to life with 30 second spots of the ice imp taunting Mainers about the heat, and asking us if we missed him as we melted under the Summer sun.

Modern Philosophers, you know how much I hate Snow Miser and the details of our long running feud, but today was a really low blow.  I don’t wear a cup under my toga, and definitely needed to on this day…a day that saw me sweat through three togas!

DesertI’ve never been good at estimating temperatures, but I’d guess it was about 125 degrees around noon when I dared to leave the safety of the air conditioning and venture outside.  To the left, is one of the pictures I took of the view outside my office.  Notice how unrelenting the sun looks.  Shortly after that photo was taken, my camera melted.  Luckily, I had already uploaded the shot to my laptop.

Snow Miser must have spent a fortune on all his little commercials, but money is obviously no object to a celebrity of his magnitude.  I’m certain nothing brings his frozen heart more joy than knowing that I’m grumbling about him under my breath during the Summer, a season that has always been devoid of the white haired weather terrorist’s presence.

DIGITAL CAMERATo make things worse, they are doing construction work on one of the bridges that connects Bangor to Brewer, which meant there was actually traffic on the commute home.  I took the photo on the left with a camera I borrowed from a friend.

As you can see, traffic was wicked terrible and as we crawled home under the scorching sun, we had to listen to Snow Miser mocking us on our camel radios!

Good news, though, Modern Philosophers.  While I have been writing this article out on the porch of The House on the Hill, the skies have darkened and rain has come to cool off the desert.  The thunder and lightning from the storm is messing with radio and TV reception, so Snow Miser’s message is not transmitting as clearly as it had been.

Singing RainSo in the end, it looks like we’re getting the last laugh.  Here’s a photo my neighbor just took of me as I celebrated the storm and Snow Miser’s defeat.

What a glorious feeling!  I’m happy again…

How about you, Modern Philosophers?  What are you doing to stay cool this Summer?  Has Snow Miser taken over the airwaves in your neck of the woods?  How does one get sweat stains out of a toga?

Remember, Deep Thoughts are a great way to keep your brain cool…


About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Humor, Philosophy and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

32 Responses to Snow Miser Taunts Mainers: “Miss Me Now, Punks?”

  1. Reblogged this on By the Mighty Mumford and commented:

  2. Funny thing…there actually ARE SAND DUNES in Maine!!!!! 🙂

    • Austin says:

      I know! Today, they were right outside my office. So weird…like something out of a Stephen King novel. Or a Modern Philosopher blog… 😉

  3. I’ll take sand dunes and heat over being cold any day 🙂

  4. I live for fall and spring. Not only that, though I don’t particularly like being cold, I’m one of the rare people who finds it much easier to stay warm in winter than cool in summer. That being said, I LOVE Snow Miser! I even have his song on my ipod, if you can believe that! And the guy that did the voice for him (Dick Shawn) was a greatly under appreciated talent. He also portrayed “the guy who played Hitler” in Mel Brooks; The Producers. And now I think I have bombarded your comments section with enough useless trivia for today!

  5. Kate Lester says:

    You’ll just have to challenge Snow Miser to step out into the hot sun with his taunts.

  6. alise says:

    love this! you are very funny, sir. I am glad the heat hasn’t taken away your sense of humor.

  7. momshieb says:

    Two words: Iced. Coffee.
    Go to hell, Snow Miser! You were around WAY too much this winter…..

  8. grannyK says:

    Here, the hot weather is going to begin on Friday. We will then sweat like mad demons until mid September. As for the stains….just buy new togas. That’s my solution!

  9. That Snow Miser is a real piece of work. Maybe he’s lashing out because he’s lonely?

    • Austin says:

      You need to read my older posts on Snow Miser. This is a decades long feud, which dates back to my stealing his girlfriend when we were in high school…

  10. You know its funny…weather forecast keeps saying we’re raining but I haven’t seen a drop of rain yet…its been like that for the past 24 hours and forecasted for the next 24 hours! LOL!

    • Austin says:

      All the rain in the world was apparently in Maine last night. I cannot believe how hard it was falling! Sat out on the porch and just watched it in amazement…

  11. jaklumen says:

    No Snow Miser here– just Rain Woman. Normally we have summers that are plenty sunny, but our summer so far has been punctuated by rain and temperature drops. Monday dipped down to like 65F, during the day.

    I, um, I blame Seattle. Yeah, that’s convenient.

  12. ksbeth says:

    Happy you made it back alive to your oasis on the hill

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