Nap Debate Might Be Swing Issue In Maine Gubernatorial Election

The calendar turns to October tomorrow, Modern Philosophers, which means that Election Day is a lot closer than we realize.

The Maine Gubernatorial Race has given us some very entertaining headlines, and spirited back and forth between the two main candidates, Governor Paul LePage and challenger Mayor McCheese.

While McCheese continues to enjoy a double digit lead in the polls, a new issue has come to the forefront that could be the Haily Mary LePage has been needing.

“The Sleep, Nap, & Other Relaxation Endeavors (SNORE) Initiative is the most important issue up for debate as we approach Election Day,” Eliza van Winkle, President of the activist group SNORE NOW, told this Modern Philosopher.  “We want to make nap breaks a mandatory part of the work day in Maine, and the candidate that supports SNORE is going to win this election.”

Not everyone agrees with van Winkle’s assessment of SNORE’s power to control the outcome.  “I think that SNORE is a hot button topic, but it’s not going to swing the election,” Zeus, Father of the Greek Gods and McCheese’s Campaign Manager, countered.  “I say that because Mayor McCheese is going to be the next Governor of Maine, and he does not endorse the SNORE Initiative.”

Zeus was happy to expand on his comment.  “You know that Mayor McCheese supports hardworking Mainers, Austin, and he comes from a blue collar background.  He worked his way up the ladder at McDonald’s, starting out as a fry guy while in high school.   In all his years working there, he has never been the beneficiary of a nap break.”

“While he can see why it would appeal to Mainers, Mayor McCheese fears that adding naps to the work day will only promote an environment of slackerdom.    In the long run, that would be very bad for Maine.”

Of course, the people at SNORE NOW don’t agree with this.  “If Maine workers were able to take a couple of power naps a day, production would increase and Maine’s economy would get a solid boost,” van Winkle assured me.

The big question is: Will Governor LePage back the SNORE Initiative in a last minute attempt to steal this election, and earn a second term in The Blaine House?

LePage, who is infamous for being a total crank when he is tired, has yet to take a stance on the hot button topic.

“We have been begging him to back SNORE, but he won’t,” one frustrated LePage staffer told this Modern Philosopher.  “The Governor has taken such a strong stance against Welfare, MaineCare, and pretty much doing anything to help people that he doesn’t think work hard enough, so he doesn’t feel like he can support SNORE without looking like a hypocrite.”

“But we point out that he constantly contradicts himself, and takes a stance that best reflects his mood on any given day, so why not just support SNORE?” a second LePage staffer volunteered.  “He’s getting thumped in the polls by a giant Quarter Pounder with Cheese.  He needs to do whatever it takes to win!”

It will be interesting to see where the frontrunners end up going with this issue, Modern Philosophers.  Zeus assures me that Mayor McCheese will not change his stance, and I believe him.

Governor LePage, however, is the wildcard.  As always.  If he wants to win badly enough, he might very well decide that napping at work is a right that our Forefathers fought for back in the Revolutionary War.

Where do you stand on the SNORE Initiative, Modern Philosophers?